Common Fallacies found in everyday interaction

Debates, online and otherwise, are happening left and right over issues and things we encounter in the news. Gay marriage and abortion have been in the news more recently because of pride month and some US states passing restrictions on abortion.

These topics, as well as others, can spark very heated debates and many times, we see the arguments go in directions we simply didn't mean to. Now, I'll be the first to admit that I do do some of these fallacies but I try my best not to. I won't be talking about formal fallacies or ones which show a deficiency in the reasoning.

I will be talking about the fallacies which derail the conversation or ones which aim to shut the conversation down. I'll admit to not knowing the names of all of these fallacies but when I do, I'll try. These fallacies we should really try to purge from our everyday interactions as to come up to more fruitful conversations.

1. "You're wrong coz you're stupid." - The good old ad hominem! Attacking a person's character does nothing to further your argument. This also turns the conversation into, "Is the person you're talking to stupid?" and you've got a derailed conversation. Ways to avoid if you are on the receiving end of such an argument is, "Even if I was stupid, it doesn't mean my argument is wrong." Of course on online forums, this might just go over people's heads so I say fold your cards and stop wasting time online.
2. "What qualifications do you have that you can say X?" - Kinda like the reverse of the appeal to authority but not quite. As an engineer, I get this a lot when I'm talking about things like history, biology, or philosophy. True, I don't have a degree in those things but I fill my free time learning about these fields. Also anyone can talk, at least on a shallow level about things like, law, policy, religion, science and history! I mean a few years ago, a thing called the internet was invented and we can learn a bunch of stuff on there! In case someone throws this at you, be honest and say whatever qualifications you have. You may be a history buff who happens to be a nurse or a very well-informed saleslady. This really shouldn't disarm you.
3. "I won't talk to you unless you have a degree in ______" - This is derivative of #2 and usually follows it when you say you have no expertise on the subject. I will say however, that you will find people who do have degrees in their field of expertise but nonetheless know nothing about the issue. A degree does not make one an expert. Also, the lack of a degree does not mean the person doesn't know what he's talking about.
4. "You're opinion doesn't matter because you're X" - This is a classic way people want to discredit you and your thoughts. Aside from this simply doesn't follow, it can actually be said to be discriminatory. It basically says that one group's ideas don't matter because of who they are or what they are. To counter this, show the inherent discrimination in their statement. Really, if it's a conversation worth having, one should be happy to accept all points of view.
5. "Fight me!" - This one is silly and really has absolutely nothing to do with any argument. It simply means the argument has gotten so heated that someone would want to be violent to prove a point (which still wouldn't be made). If this comes up, it's best to let things cool off or simply reject the offer outright. Never engage with this offer.
6. "Your view reflects how disconnected you are from people different than you." - I got this a while back and it actually reflects how much this person did not know me well enough. She saw my Facebook profile and twitter feed and assumed I'm disconnected from people different from me. Now, I'll admit that I'm pretty much disconnected from almost all people in my life except 10. This however, has absolutely nothing to do with any argument. When faced with this accusation, simply ask them how they know you're disconnected and then make a case where it's because you know people affected by the issue that you know you're right - don't lie of course.
7. "You're totally missing the point" - Not really a fallacy but one which could see a conversation spiraling out of control. It may be that both of you don't have your basic principles in line. Or one of you values one thing more than another. It's nice to see what they mean and you never know! You might end up changing your own mind on it.
8. "You're just being hateful!" - This is a more specific example of an ad hominem. Now, arguments should never be hateful and if you were, you must apologize. It becomes a fallacy when thrown around simply because you don't agree with them. This issue arises when someone assumes that their position is correct and all other positions are wrong. This should be avoided on all sides. I think it's safe to say that if you're both debating an issue, it's safe to say both of you have the greater good in mind. It may take a little reminder that both of you ultimately want what's best.
9. "So you support killing/raping/stealing/etc." - Drawing caricatures of other people's arguments then attacking that caricature (or straw manning) is common in debates. If that's done to you, a good way to respond would be to simply ask when you have supported such atrocious acts. They will normally go through their argument and you can spot the formal fallacy lurking in the shadows.
10. "Keep your religion out of policy making." - Unless you use solely religious reasons for your argument, this would most definitely be considered a fallacy. I've had numerous conversations with friends and acquaintances where they mention my religious bias when I had not mentioned any religious view. I'd agree that policy needs to be based on objective truths and solely religious beliefs. One must be careful when making arguments that may like they have religious origin.

That's all for this post. Conversations about important issues need to stick to the topic. Being sidetracked by other less important issues hinders the debate and what ends up happening is you have less time to tackle the root of the problem.